How to STOP comparing your career with other women?

In the last year, I went through a turning point for my well-being and began to re-evaluate my career goals. Every time I saw my old school friends traveling the world or getting well-paid jobs, I felt inadequate. Many of my friends still live with their parents, have great jobs at reputable companies, or work at home part-time to raise their children. They all seem happy. As I looked at their careers, I wondered if I was just unrealistic or not working hard enough.

Over the past few weeks, I've learned how to stop this toxic comparison cycle. I realized comparison is the thief of joy. Sure, nothing beats a bit of friendly competition to get you going. But, constantly comparing yourself with others- particularly in the career area- is nearly always a recipe for disaster.

We've listed five reasons why you should take a break from analyzing how you stack up against everyone else. Quite frankly, it doesn't matter.

1. Probably not relevant.

Suddenly, you hear that an old high school best friend has landed a new job at a high-profile law firm. Instead of feeling happy or proud, you are overwhelmed with intense jealousy.

You think "I wish I had a job like her," "Oh, she must make a lot of money."

However, guess what? Her profession is entirely different. You didn't go to law school, and you have no desire to work in legal matters. It's human nature, though, to compare yourself to others, no matter how much (or how little) you share.

But comparing yourself to other people is another thing altogether. What is the point of doing this when the other person's background or industry isn't relevant? I find it to be a pointless exercise in futility. Instead, aim to replicate the success of three or four accomplished professionals or influencers in your chosen field. As you know, comparing apples with oranges isn't constructive.

Credits@Google

2. It Sets Unhealthy Goals.

Striking for perfection is not wrong. However, I'd never recommend breaking your back to keep up with everyone. It will only lead to dissatisfaction. Make the most of your time by working toward the personal goals and ambitions that lead to improved performance and a sense of accomplishment.

It's true that constantly worrying about how others are doing won't help you. Therefore, you should set goals to help you achieve your goals (not just those that look good on your portfolio). You might be pleasantly surprised!

3. Quite disappointing.

The comparison game seems fun. Either you feel miserable and defeated or incredibly talented and victorious. Most often, though, constantly comparing yourself to others is deflating.

Perhaps the tech company where your college friend works just gave her a big promotion. Maybe your random acquaintance posted an award she received on Facebook. Good for her! But what do you gain by beating yourself over the head with it? They do nothing but make you feel irritated, unappreciated, and unimportant.

Sure, seeing that your old roommate from college still works at the local dairy might brighten your day. That habit is not only mean-spirited but also counterproductive. Rather than feeling superior, work on recognizing your areas for improvement and growth. Perhaps then, you will also find yourself at the dairy freeze.

Credits@Google

4. It’s an utter waste of time.

When you compare yourself to others, you rarely get anything positive and productive out of it. You are essentially wasting your time on something that could be more beneficial.

Think of some actionable ways to improve yourself instead of scrolling through Facebook self-deprecatingly. How about your LinkedIn profile? Enroll in a seminar or workshop you've been looking forward to. Include some new projects in your online portfolio.

Go for it! It's far more productive than cyber-stalking your second-grade pen pal.

5. Things aren't always as they seem.

People are prone to presenting the rosiest version of their lives, especially on social media. Don't be fooled into thinking you're the only one facing tough times or facing uphill struggles.

The friend who posted recently about leaving her full-time job and becoming a freelancer full-time? Well, of course, she's not going to say that she's terminated. Remember the friend from college who is on vacation? She probably won't mention that she hated her job, and now she needs time to rethink her options.

It's not always what it seems. It's pointless to compare yourself to a mirage.

Credits@Google

Always keep in mind that your career is only one slice of the pie. So, don't let it solely be responsible for the foul taste in your mouth.

It's natural to compare yourself with others. But, that doesn't mean the comparison is valuable. Remember these reasons, turn off that pesky voice in your head, and spend all your energy on something productive. Success will be in your sights!