My boyfriend goes on trips without me. What should I do?

Dear Petrica,

  My boyfriend and I have been in 4 years of relationship. In a few months, we would be heading into our 5th year. So, I wanted to plan a special trip with him. But, he is traveling solo. I got angry at him for this, and we had our fight. It has been three days since I am not talking to him. What do I do?

Sophia!

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Dear Sophia,

                          Hi gorgeous! Thank you for writing. I feel this is a common question that all of us have. Just read this and understand what I am trying to convey!

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Actually, I don’t see anything wrong with this. If your significant other is taking a solo trip, then why don’t you do the same thing? I think it is good for a couple to be apart and do things on their own sometimes.  It is a healthy way to maintain your individuality and then coming together again and be happy to see each other and spend some quality time together. He is your boyfriend, not your husband. Even if he was, it is always good to have your own space and discover yourself. Sophia, when you are in a relationship, it can sometimes feel like there is an inherent pressure to do everything with your partner. This pressure doesn’t come from within the relationship; it comes from society. They are the ones who promote the idea that if couples don’t do everything from going to the grocery store to taking trips together, it is evident that a breakup is imminent.

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But Sophia, we know that separate lives and hobbies are an integral part of a healthy relationship. So, it is unfair to expect that your partner should have the same interest as yours, but I understand your concern too. So, for this, traveling solo without your partner- and your partner traveling solo without you-is something both of you should discuss at length before making any plans. So, here are a few reasons why traveling solo could end up making your relationship stronger:

1.) It makes you confident and prevents you from relying on your partner in an unhealthy way.

2.) It allows you to travel the way you want to live.

3.) It helps you increase the amount of trust you have in each other.

4.) Absence makes your love grow fonder.

5.) You will establish a healthier relationship with your significant other.

So, Sophia, talk to him, and just tell him to have fun! Meanwhile, you also plan solo travel, and when both of you get back together, take a couple trip together and celebrate your “fabulous five years” of courtship.

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Love!

Petrica!