“Relationship goals” has become a popular saying these days, especially on social media. So what exactly should we strive for when it comes to our relationships?
There’s more to it than lavish vacations and cute matching outfits. A healthy and happy relationship starts with setting relationship goals, which makes it easier to stay on track. Here are 11 relationship goals you should strive for with your partner to cultivate strong and lasting love.
1. Accept imperfection as a part of life.
It’s important to keep in mind that no relationship is perfect, but it’s easy to forget. Your partner is not perfect, neither are you; you are both imperfect people who have chosen to make life together. In fairy tales, movies, and social media, relationships are often portrayed as flawless, giving the false impression that a healthy relationship is conflict-free.
2. Gain a mutual understanding.
Every individual has different goals for their relationship, as well as different ways to express and receive love. Couples should learn their love languages. These languages include affirmations, quality time, gifts, acts of service, and physical contact. You can better understand each other’s love languages by understanding yours and your partner’s so you can support each other and create smart goals together.
3. Identify core beliefs and values.
Make sure you and your partner share the same values and beliefs when it comes to your relationship goals. You and your unit are evolving both individually and collectively over time, so this is not a one-off conversation. If you and your partner were able to pick up and move whenever you wanted five years ago, that would be one of your core values. Now that you’re craving stability, you’d like to settle down somewhere. If your values have shifted, talk to your partner about how you can move forward together.
4. Communicate better.
The upbringing, worldview, strengths, and weaknesses of everyone in a romantic relationship are different. If you are not sure how your partner feels about a certain topic, ask them! Communication is another important aspect of creating a strong relationship between you and your partner. A couple’s therapy session can also help you get to know each other better and improve your communication.
5. Set up a judgment-free zone.
There is nothing worse than being criticized by your partner, especially when you are sharing something difficult. Establishing a judgment-free zone will enable your partner to be open and honest with you. When you feel agitated, take a break and resume the difficult conversation when you feel calmer. Although difficult conversations are never easy, they are essential for growing your relationship over the long run.
6. Manage your emotions.
You should not expect your partner to read your mind. You must communicate your needs clearly to the other person. If your partner said something that upsets you, simply say, “That hurts my feelings.” It can be very helpful to focus on your own internal state and how you feel about what your partner did or said, rather than giving them the silent treatment, blowing up, or name-calling.
7. Show vulnerability.
All relationships are made up of good and bad days. Feeling free to express yourself is the foundation for a healthy and happy relationship. On the bad days, how you show up for each other will be telling of your long-term viability. Everyone should feel loved unconditionally and not hide their feelings.
8. Put each other first.
When we’re busy and have a packed schedule, it’s easy to put our long-term relationships on hold. However, shared goals should always include consistent love and attention, especially as time passes. For a long-lasting relationship to flourish, you have to put in the effort.
9. Share the storm together.
Being in a relationship means you’re committing to weathering life’s curveballs together, whether your loved one dies, a child is sick, your partner is laid off, or you get an accident. Being there for each other is easy when things are going well, but a strong relationship is one that can stand by each other when times are hard. If your partner is struggling, think about the best way to support them.
10. Respect each other.
No matter what your partner says or does, it’s still important to treat them with respect. By saying something like “I’m not sure I agree with you, but I respect your opinion,” you’re telling your partner that your relationship is secure enough for you to have your own experiences in life.
11. Become friends with others.
Long-term relationships shouldn’t always feel like work, they should also be fun! You can keep your bond strong by spending time with your partner, just like you would a friend. Take a cooking class together, learn salsa, or watch a new TV show together. Making new memories together will refresh your bond.
Relationships are two-way streets. For a relationship to work, both people have to work hard. If you set healthy relationship boundaries and create relationship goals, you’ll be setting yourself up for more good days than bad. Embrace the journey together, and watch your love flourish. Every relationship is unique, so focus on your specific needs and aspirations when setting your goals.
