There are countless explanations for why someone decides not to consume alcohol, but they are not required to give you one.
Many people enjoy drinking alcohol in social settings. Others may engage in damaging behaviours as a result. Some people decide to maintain sober because to health issues. Some people dislike how drinking alcohol makes them feel. Additionally, those who are attempting to get pregnant or who are pregnant should refrain from drinking.
Why it’s inappropriate to inquire as to why someone isn’t drinking
If someone does inquire, they can be pressuring them into an uncomfortable talk about their struggles with addiction, infertility, or other issues that they aren’t ready to face.
They may be in recovery, striving towards recovery, or in the “contemplative stage of transformation,” where they “recognise they’re battling with something but they’re not sure exactly the problem they feel they have with it.”
The National Centre for Drug Abuse Statistics estimates that one in ten Americans over the age of 12 have an alcohol use disorder, despite the fact that there is a growing trend of “sober-curious” individuals.
What should you never say to a non-drinker of alcohol?
*Let’s live a little, please*
When someone gives up alcohol, they can worry that other people would find them uninteresting. If someone says this at a bar after having a few drinks, they can feel awkward or like the “party pooper.” Walker notes that quitting drinking can be a significant choice for an individual. It might have even been a matter of life or death.
It is inaccurate and unhelpful to describe someone who doesn’t drink as ‘boring. Most sober people have a number of non-alcoholic methods to socialize, and that doesn’t make them any less entertaining.
*What do you do if you don’t drink, then?*
It is possible to prevent this awkward circumstance by never questioning a person’s motivations for abstaining from alcohol in the first place. Most often, a non-drinker behaves in the same way as everyone else, but without the use of alcohol. They are still able to go to pubs, clubs, and parties, and drinking isn’t the only way to blend in. It might be challenging for someone who doesn’t drink, though, to feel as though they must continually defend themselves.
*Do you not feel as though you are missing out?*
Going sober can be a barrier for some individuals, but the truth is that the person who doesn’t drink doesn’t miss out. They simply socialise differently. Without alcohol, people might even learn more about who they are and what they want. This is especially true the longer someone has been sober since they discover new methods to have fun.
*Then why?*
Humans are naturally curious, so it makes sense that you would want to find out more when someone claims they don’t drink, especially if everyone else you know genuinely likes to do so. But asking someone’s reasons for not drinking is intrusive, especially if you don’t know them well.
If someone refuses to say why they are not drinking, they almost always have a good excuse. Perhaps they don’t want to talk about it because it’s a private problem.
Instead, if someone declines your offer of an alcohol, you can simply say, “OK. Can I get something else for you?
That could be your literal response.
It is best for loved ones to approach friends and family members rather than press them for information about someone’s decision to abstain from alcohol, whether it be for a single night or over an extended period of time.
